Once upon a time there were 5 best friends.
The girls were best friends since they were little girls.
The boys too.
They grew up together.
(some day I'll get the pic of us actually looking at the camera)
Went to school together.
Went to church together. 
And sang together.
They dated. Sometimes other people. But mostly each other.
Some of them got married - to each other.
While others married someone else!
Someone perfect for them! 
They grew up and had kids!
Cute kids!
Really cute kids!!
They can hang-out! All together!
and Amazingly still be friends!!
Some of them got married - to each other.
While others married someone else!
Someone perfect for them! They grew up and had kids!Cute kids!
Really cute kids!! Even the spouses get a long - and have a history!
They can hang-out! All together!
and Amazingly still be friends!!
This is where the flowery music stops and the car's breaks come to a screeching halt!!!
Okay - imagine getting a message from your High School boyfriends wife (whom I love and think she is awesome) but still - they are coming to where you live!!! And they want to see you!!!Okay? Have you channeled that feeling?
The kind of throw-up/nervous - what-the-heck-I-am-going-go-do feeling?
Got it?
Great!
So you anticipate this monstrous event! The last time you "hung out" with this boy you had the other 3 of the 5 to buffer the situation! It was 5 years ago! Before you had kids!!!
That was your "old life"- you have "new life!" There is no bridge to that old life! It's either sink - or swim!!
Still got that feeling?
Great!
Now - you think they're coming - but you haven't heard from them. No definite plans. The weekend comes and goes.
You're thinking. Okay. Well, I feel better! Off the hook...although...when they blog about it and you're not in it...might be weird...Oh well!
So...the next weekend - you're just hanging out and you get the phone call. The phone call that comes and your stomach drops!
You got the weekend - wrong! They are not only coming - but they are on their way!!!
You remember that feeling? Oh - 10 times worse!!!
But - you've got to act cool! Remember the time before high school?! You were friends! You used to get in trouble for talking - in the FIRST GRADE!!! Channel the first grade!!!
Okay - it's not going to be too bad. But then you remember the time before the last time you saw him.
AWKWARD!!!
That was the time at your sister-in-law's wedding reception that he showed up too! And at the rehearsal dinner he and your husband tried to "1-up" each other on embarrassing stories...of YOU!!!! How your first-dates with both of them were very similar and both humiliating!
NO - THAT was not going to happen again!
You are more assertive! You have backbone! It's been 9 years!!! You've had kids!! You are a mamma bear! Channel Mamma Bear!!
Okay - still got that feeling?
You make dinner - pull out all the stops! Everything is ready!
They come!
You see them through the window and you think - what are we going to talk about? What if we sit around the table and there is NOTHING to say!!! You're not even sure if He really wants to come - or is it just the PC thing to do!!!
Oh man - the feelings here and it's strong!!
He comes in...do you hug or shake hands?! The time before last time YOU held out YOUR hand - that was awkward! The last time - you don't remember - the buffer's were there!!!!
Let him decide!
He hugs!
You throw-up...okay not really - but almost!
You take his wife on a tour - boys hang out!
10 minute tour! She's awesome! It's easy when you feel like you know her (THANK YOU BLOGGING!!)
Dinner - cold!
Oh well!
No awkward silences - but where there's potential - you're nervous!
Conversation - starts to turn - embarrassing - but after 10 years - it's funny!
You're laughing!
You're telling the stories! You're really laughing!
All things TABOO - so out there! And they are so funny!!
You have such a good time!
You can't remember the last time you had this much fun - just talking!
The spouses even talk about 'their' old times and the two of you talk! About everyone and everything! Slowly the bridge builds.
The kids?! Played so well! So fun!
You have such a good time!
They leave but not without promises that you'll come and visit!
And of course you say you will and (surprisingly) mean it!!
They leave...late.
After they are gone - you realize your thankful - you know why He was in your life and your thankful the bridge is built. That bridge isn't going anywhere. It's nice to have a bridge. It makes your life feel...more whole. There is no-old life/new life! Just one life. One really good life. With really good friends. Some old - some new. But the ones that are for a lifetime that cross those bridges with you are the ones to cherish.
I don't think I would ever had felt this way - had we had only gotten together with the "buffers." I don't think it was "closure" but the opportunity of "building" something new, something different, something great! And for that - I am eternally grateful!!!
After they leave you have to give a min-by-min to your BFF in Cali and your BFF here. And of course to your sisters - who by-the-way call in the middle of the evening - but of course you don't answer the phone! But one leaves a message in that sing-songy voice wondering how everything is going!!!
All those girls say they couldn't have done it - and others who knew - thought it was a little weird - but that's okay -
You realize that the only way you did it - was because
The two you had FIRST GRADE!!
11 comments:
Cute, very cute. Love, Mom xoxoxo
What a great story! I guess all relationships must go through the fire at sometime or another. The question is, will it refine us or destroy us? It is only then, we discover if that bridge is made of steel or wood.
I'm glad it was a happy ending to another chapter.
Until next time...
I always wished I could be part of a group like that growing up, what a great group you guys have. And I absolutly LOVE how you write-every thought connection and how hilariouslly true it all is, all the feelings and thoughts that hit us at once. When you say it-it makes sense-and it makes me laugh. I'm glad dinner was a hit, reunions aren't always smooth.
Wow!! So I had no idea you felt all of this!!!! I am sorry we almost gave you a heart attack and made you about lose your cookies!! Just kidding!!!! I am sorry if us showing up put your whole weekend into a spin. Thanks again for everything again and hopefully next time we'll give you some better advanced notice to get ready!!! ;-)
Your emotions were so vivid! I felt exactly how you felt while I was reading it! Wow!!
P.S. It was fun seeing your high school photos. Do you mind if I put a link on our blog so my family can see Ammon's high school pics or is that just too much?
They are really awesome people! You and Paul are too. I wished we all lived close together and could all hang out. I guess that's what the blogging world is for, I'm glad we can all me at least a little part of each others' lives. thanks for sharing that story.
I thought it would be fun to have my ex and his wife over for dinner, but maybe it would be a little awkward. Maybe in a few years when I've grown up a bit more. I'm glad you had a fun time though. Take care! We miss you!
Wow. My Senior year & Fresno came back to me, ALL-AT-ONCE. Sick feeling, too. Not pleasant. AnyhOw. . .
WOW CRIS!!! Say howdy-hey to Ammon for me, would you? And, btw, I think I took that first pic. I have another one REeeAaaLLL similar, probaby taken on the same day. Shall I share????
nah.
Will do! And absolutely!
Wow, what a good lookin' group that was! FUN TIMES! It was fun to see the pictures and think about the old days. I'll check to see if I have the picture with everybody looking and will send it to you. I still have the picture frame collage that you gave me for my 17th birthday with the pictures of all of us, it's actually in our hallway. Glad the kids played so well together that night.
"The Buffers"
I don't know HOW I missed this post, but I did. Too funny Cristy! Since I knew you in high school and "back then" it really is fun to see how life changes, everyone moves on how we have out little families and life progresses. It makes me feel old!:) But it sounds like a fun night. You and Paul are great--and so are Kirsten and Ammon!:)
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